All Hail Spanx...I Mean All....SHE and HE

Spanx streamline the shape,

Without any panty lines,

A must-have for SHEs

I like Spanx so much that I just wrote a haiku about them.  It could be their next big campaign.  I think the haiku is coming back into mainstream any day now.  Seriously...any day.

Bad poetry aside, I was an early adopter to Spanx.  You see, one of the downsides of aging is loss of elasticity of the skin.  You couple that with body fat re-distribution (and a few babies) and things can get a bit lumpy.      

I received my new Spanx catalog in the mail yesterday. Their R&D team is amazing...(their advertising team, not so much).  Check out these new items:

 These are similar to the original Spanx, but now with super special technology for the front, back, and sides.  And they are only $32.00!!!  

[Side Note:  Wearing these underneath a short skirt while walking in windy areas...like at a scientific convention in Chicago...is less embarrassing than wearing other undergarments below the skirt...I'm just saying....] 

This is a shirt!  Okay, it's $72.00 but you could wear it under a suit or under a casual summer top.  Same fancy technology as other Spanx to reduce lumpiness and muffin-topness. Comes in different colors too.

The bathing suits range from weird to cute.  This one here is actually a one piece that is designed to look like a tankini...and I think it's comparable in cuteness to other tankinis on the market.  However, let's be real for a minute...if you have legs like this woman I highly doubt that you need a Spanx tankini.  So if anyone buys this, let the rest of us know if it's a good buy at $107.00 (on sale from $178.00).

Now here is something I never would have predicted...but makes a lot of sense.

As HEs get older, they get a little lumpy too.  Now many don't care (though when they take their shirts off, I wish they would), but I bet some do.  Especially if you have a special occasion like a wedding or formal affair.  They are about a million times more expensive than a regular cotton undershirt at $58.00, but perhaps worth it?

They make a sleeveless version too.  Although, I find it a little ironic that you can see this guy's washboard stomach through his shirt.  It's a little hard to believe that this shirt will minimize a beer gut when it cannot contain the musculature of this male model.  Maybe it's built into the shirt for that price?  

What do you think?